Song after remaining (mind/heart) illness

I used to ask for things I knew
Answers i kept inside of me
Answers given again by the old man who isn't old anymore.

I'm scared of my very own blood
Not related to the past
Direct past.

Present is much more uncertain than the future
Friends around me become unknown members of a secret gang

I'm delutional, I feel solitude
Unloved
Love taken away
Love missing, which used to be in a bed.

Large bed, I'm laying in a large bed
I touch the sheets
Sheets before touched by whom once was there
waiting for me to come out
from the woman who still loves him.

This woman moans at night, missing
Wishing for presence.

I watch and fear of present
When will future become undone?